Are you smarter than a Year 5 swimmer?

Everyone knows how bad my spoken Mandarin is. My cantonese was improved by speaking to Aikido dudes. My Mandarin has also improve MUCH since I started teaching swimming since 2++ years back. And what the hell...most of the words are translated for me by my 6 to 11-year-old students during swimming lessons. My MANDARIN ... aha ...see below on how those kids taught me how to speak new vocabs:

English = Mandarin (contoh ayat: "said by me")


1. Straight = che (contoh ayat: "Wah lau, please la, for God's grace if you don't want to drown, che your hands!)."


2. Bengkok = wan (contoh ayat: "Your hands, please la, don't wannnn; Ni yau sze arrr?? (you wanna die arr)"


3. Push down = aann or ing (??) (contoh ayat: "Wei, I will die, not you, if you aann my hands down."


4. Swimming = yu yong (contoh ayat: Wei, why the chubby boy never come yu chui today?? (Hokkein vocab already! :P)


5. Mouth open and blow! = (man, I thought this is the most explicit of all). Some kids literally translated this phrase for me! Innocent...


6. Open = kai (contoh ayat = "Wei, for breast-stroke, your legs are supposed to kai big big like a circle and then push hard ....!!" (Hope their mothers can explain to them when they get home).


Broken also my England after speaking to my students. Still, some parents forced me to speak broken English with their kids. And again, I wonder if they understood the rest of my rojak sentence; I don't even want to know what 'DROWNING' is in Mandarin, in case those gazing parents accuse me of spreading the negativity of death (wait, didn't I said the word 'die' all this time?!).

Because of the multiple languages Malaysians speak, don't you just love being the Malaysia?? But I don't want to spread a new religion in the pool. And maybe that's why most of the time I swim alone. :)

Could it be...

My white blood count was high. No fever. So, it's definitely not bacteria/virus whatever infection. It started with a body ache and some twitches while in the lab. IN THE LAB. All these symptoms within one hour of my handling a neurotoxic material - Acrylamide/bis-acrylamide. I don't mind getting sick due to skin contact with that chemical, but I think infertility is one of long term effects that I honestly fear a lot. Why I suspect that chemical was the culprit was because that was my first time handling it (though I did wore gloves) and I had no sore throat, flu, sickness prior to this. And the funny thing was - my body failure happened very quick (like a succession of fits within an hour) and there was no fever. If not, what is it that my body is trying to defend? Why did my body generate sooo much white blood!? That damn chemical...must be. Too bad I didn't tell the doctor about it as I have forgotten all about my handling of this potent chemical. My research colleague heard of 2 Ph.D. students in Biotechnology faculty being diagnosed with breast cancer recently due to high radiation exposure in their lab. *worried*

Another theory was stress. Hmmphhh...likely cause but I doubt anything could caused me to stress. I was not even stressed that weel! In fact, I just got back from a relaxing 4-day trip in Perhentian-Redang. And what's teaching swimming 7 days in a week compared to me having to go for swimming competition and trained twice a day for one month!?!??! WHAT STRESS DID I GET??? My uncle doctor called up to ask me not to drink too much coffee as the caffeine masks the body's tiredness. Maybe I didn't know I was tired. And I had lack of sleep though. Had to admit.

I prefer to blame it on the chemical. Stress?? - meh!!! If there's 6 billion people in this world, I dare declare that I, Ivy Chai could handle stress the best! (I've been pressured, but never been stressed-out)

Ms. SJMC

Ms. SJMC was the name given to me by my aikido instructor due to my frequent apperance in Subang Jaya Medical Centre. I worked there for 3 months in 2003, but I still think I don't deserve this nickname!

This time I was warded due to a mild fits. My body was overstressed though my mind was basically 'normal'. (No worries, I still am Ph.D. material :) I don't know how to define my disease but basically my bones and joins all got numb and my heartbeat was so quick i thought I had a heart attack. I just couldn't move and my body starts to ache like crazy (esp. my neck)!! Plus, my legs were wobbly. And I broke out in cold sweats. I thought it was denggi fever or some viral fever, but I don't even have a temperature to start with. Both the SJMC doctor and my doctor uncle added that it could be a panic attack or stress-related disorder. Maybe a nervous breakdown.

So, here I was in SJMC. Results showed that my white blood count was extremely high that I thought it was leukemia (doc didn't think so, but I'm soo 'proud' to query him about leukemia). Touchwood, hope it's not. Just my immune system went to its lowest low. Got some bacteria infection in blood and urine (could be due to low immunity) but still....weirdest thing....no fever!!!! Drink loads of water (coffee can ahh?) and rest (sleep) more was the advice. Hey, but I thought I slept a lot in Redang!??!?! Damn.

After a burst appendicitis and my initial Bell's palsy scare, I always know what to do first thing I feel ANY pain - GO TO SJMC! (because got insurance already marrr).

Fondue

Fondue - a foreign word that was familiar but I didn't actually know what it means. 'Til I met my girlfriends in Chilis, BSC one night, I didn't know it was a type of dessert. So here goes - all my chatty girlfriends were trying to describe to me with their own elaborative adjectives of what a fondue is. I thought: why don't we just stick to wiki, eh?

I went to Haagen Dazs at Bangsar Village to see/taste for myself what a fondue was. So it did look like what I expected it to look like (after I looked it in wiki) (warning: tongue twisted here). The presentation was absolutely charming Somehow I expected the chocolate to overflow like a lava (or like the banjir kilat in KL), but my wild imagination failed me again.

Oooooo...macam rusa masuk kampung, so here is what I did: dip in my fresh fruits, ice cream, cakes and whatever they've dumped me with! Oooo..I didn't know that earlier but I was glad to bring along a not-soo-kampung guy to teach me to fondue. I think I need a 'Fondue For Dummies' book.

I had a great time! Yeah, like the time when he messed my face with chocolate and ice-cream. The fondue was just enough for 2 people (he ate most of it). I think it was about RM56.90 but I would pay any amount for the fun and indulgence I had that moment in Haagen.

Perhentian-Redang-Lang Tengah Trip

I was suprised by my own quick thinking, a spell of good lucks (only in this case, you'll see), my sole rapid decisions, and a sequence of saddening events that led to my get-away trip to Pulau Perhentian-Redang this week. First hint of things to come was that -he was suddenly gone. And what hurt me most was that he HAD the right excuse. It's the most relevant of excuses that even I, a very defensive (stubborn!) person, could not deter him. As fast as he came, he left. I wanted a week off from (lab)work to figure what does ALL of these meant, what my future holds, and what is required of me to do henceforth. I needed time and his trip gave me ample time. Thanks to Perhentian, the sharks, the turtles, the snorkellings, the weather, the sunsets and the bestest friend called Chris, I am now more confident in making a decision. Risky, but I want a decision that reflects me and yet not regretting it later.

I wanted to go Phuket, but my swimming boss told me one morning that he scratched his own Redang trip at the last minute (with deposit already paid) and beg me to replace him. So, I did. It was just 6 days before the intended trip! I needed a quick decision. Who the hell could actually ask for a leave from work that quick??!??!?!?! And the trip starts on a weekday - a Wednesday!

I actually wanted to go for the trip all ALONE, but yeah... that was the silliest thought even to start with. I knew Chris quit his previous job, so I called him first and he agreed on the spot!! He's not started his new job til next Monday. What a coinidence..

I kau-tim (settled) every piece of the packaged trip in 4hours..well..sans the itinerary. Booked the plane tickets on the same day too.

I don't want to blog about the whole trip to these pretty island paradise. It's not about the adventures, but the time off from everything - love, work, money, family, food, friends, KL. All I can say is that I had both heated conversations and friendly, crazy chatters with Chris. It was the most interesting conversation I had in years!

Chris has a brand new, unofficiated NIKON SLR camera and he snaps most of the photos. I've not gotten many photos with me as I was just armed with my camera phone. My photos can be seen here: http://picasaweb.google.co.uk/cchivy/VacationPulauPerhentianTrip912April2008

Sexy

And there was I with a bikini. My first one. If you didn't know what peer-pressure was: my bikini was the product of that. I was pressured by several girls to get myself a bikini. And the first one I picked and tried out was the ONE I bought. Needless to say, my reputation as the most modest and highly-regarded swimming teacher in town has gone down the drain! What I didn't understand was my choice of colour and pattern for my bikini. I think it was innately present in my subconcious mind to choose a hyperly kiddie bikini (in short: cheesy). My bikini had colourful hearts all over (my hairs are standing on ends now). I could have chosen a blank pink piece, but NOoo, I had to choose that hideous un-sophisticated one. WHAT A CRIME!

What was really uncomfortable besides THAT being my first bikini and my first time wearing it was that I had this large scar over my belly from a surgery due to a burst appendicitis. And there were these colourful hearts....... (sigh).

What did make me feel sexy, however, was my voice. I had literally NO VOICE (or I would say: husky) on the day of my (kinda) huge Ph.d. presentation. I was glad that it went on quite well, and even a professor said I was very sexy during presentation. And he literally added that it's not the voice, but my whole presentation was 'SEXY'. Ooooo ...WHAT IS HE IMPLYING??! :P

And nope, I'm never gonna wear that bikini. Maybe only for someone (you know who you are!!). For now, I'll stick to my Speedos. Girls, this time you can't pressure me! See you girls at my apartment.

Coffee in me.

I took a difficult break from labwork despite having more piling up in weeks to come. Still I was glad to have took it.

My parents and I made a trip to Kuantan town and then all the way up to Kemaman where we drank the more-famous-than-Ipoh-white coffee's Hai Peng's original coffee at its original shop. The only thing about this coffee is that it's not 'white-coffee' like the Ipoh one, however, still creamier and had a better aroma and taste! (Hey, I still love Ipoh Old Kopitiam, ok?!). While 'Oldtown Kopitiam' had too many franchises around KL with Bangladeshies, Vietnamese or Filipino people serving me, the only Kemaman Hai Peng shop I know of is in IOI Mall next to Popular Bookstore. Not promoting here, but I think Hai Peng's coffee is sooo superb and my dad had to say this: I'll go all the way to Kemaman to taste it again! (later I reminded him that IOI had it too) In fact, the Kemaman original shop is very small and had a 'very old-feel' to it (older than the Ipoh original one); you can see his generation still living there and still living their (grand)father's dream of not-over-expanding the business and kept it original by grinding coffee beans right behind their shop. I think it's older than the Ipoh one. It's like since 1920s. I dunno, man...wiki/google it! HERE.

Awana Kijal about 15 min from Kemaman was a thrilling sight. The beach was beautiful but the waves were a huge horror! You could surf in there! I had a great time at their olympic size pool and had steamboat buffet at night. My parents left me alone in the room while I work on my laptop, while they took strolled along the beach. Finished every sachet of the hotel's free supply of Nescafe 3in1 and conciously dreamt of Kemaman's coffee and also ximut tea (from Oldtown Kopitiam) after.

P/S: Ya, gotta thank Leong for the buy one free one Starbucks vouchers. You spoil me. And ultimately killed my NY's resolution. Thanks...

Power Failure? A sign of retaliation?

On Monday 12.30am to 2.00am, my place at Bandar Puchong Jaya faced a power failure! I've stayed in Puchong for 5 years, and this is the FIRST time this has happened! Maybe 2nd time, but rare!

(Previous) government a.k.a. BN retaliating silently? Woooo...I wonder what's next. This is getting exciting and HOT. Didn't get to save the report I was typing halfway before my computer blanks out. SWEAT!

A hero called Mohinder Suresh :P

I was so into our Malaysia GE that I forgot to continue my story. Oh, before I continue, I woke up a happier person today :) There will be changes in my life and my Malaysia.

I would continue my story by replacing 'the girl'/'she' with 'I'/'me' because it's is very obvious the silly girl in my previous post was me.

So, I sat on the stairs about to swear out loud, scolding myself. I knew I will be able to survive the ordeal because my lab is quite self-sufficient by itself. And I have access to many other labs as I bodek almost every lab assistant in my faculty. Suddenly I heard a door knob of some room above me opening and a door squeaking. I leaped and ran up 20 flights of stairs to see who was it. It was this horticulture professor (who looks like Mohinder Suresh from Heroes without the curly hair bit) and his not-so heroic-looking Ph.D. student! I shout out to them "Hey, you guys!! (literrally calling them 'guys') I think we are ALL trap lahhh!!!). They loooked at me and say "What do you mean..?" Heh, they sounded blurrer than me and immediately thought: if I were to stay in the lab, at least I have some cute company.

So, Mr. 'Mohinder Suresh' called all those emergency numbers and couldn't get throughtoo. I suggested (che...it was me who suggested!!) to climb over the faculty's window. And jump. However, peering over the window gave me the chills because it was freaking HIGH. And being vertically challenged, I thought I could never make it because there wasn't any where to support my dangling legs before I jump. First, the graduate student jumped down, and I could see he was quite frightened too and had a hard time feeling the ground. Then it was my turn. The graduate student hold my legs from below, then I realised, hey Mohinder - Do something from above! I was sooo shocked when this Mohinder asked me: "Can I touch you?"

In my mind I was like: WHAT??!!! I'm dying here! Touch me wherever you want of my body!!! OMG, sooo modest.

I finally got to my car and rushed to the ulu swimming area. My Heroes performed below expectations. Anyway, I did felt like Prison Break in a Heroes movie. What an act. I didn't wiki MY mohinder, but found out that he used to be in the reserved army. Whatever it is, if it does happen again...just call the 999 number. Thanks Fipink for this advise :P Hahahahaa.

Trapped!

Once upon a time, this lovely, cute, enthusiastic girl was driving to the Faculty of Agriculture on a fine Saturday evening where the birds where chirping and the rambutan, jambu tree branches were dancing away to the gush of wind. It was 4.55pm (significant information!). She parked her car, careful not to park directly under the rambutan tree as to avoid those chirping bird's sh*#. She entered the main entrance of the faculty, quickly to realised that the faculty was way tooo quiet for her liking, opened the four locks of the lab doors (this takes significant amount of time), trying not to remind herself of creepy lab-ghost stories and then enter quickly. She went on to search for her spectacles, because that was btw the main reason she came all the way here. She soon believes that her "tai-tau-har"-ness is still very prevalent in her life. Well, since she's already there - what the heck - switch on the computer, began to chat and check her mails. Sweet.

Ooooo....5.30pm approaches, she packs up, lock those lab doors, getting ready to drive to another ulu area to do her charity (charity because of low pay) work of teaching kids swimming. She ran quickly down the dark quiet corridor, down stairs, towards the entrance. LOCK. Well, let's try the other 4 entrances door: ALL FOUR ENTRANCES ARE GRILL and PADLOCKED too!! She told herself: you are quickly to panic; calm down for goodness' sake! She phone some in-case-of emergency numbers writen on the notice board. Mr. N is in Rawang! Mr. S was not picking up his phones and Mr. M's phone had this lady nagging "tiada dalam perkhidmatan". Damnit.

Only then did she see the clear notice bluetagged to the door. She slap her forehead hard with her palm and started banging her heads to the wall. PINTU FAKULTI DITUTUP PUKUL 5.00pm. (But why??!!!!) She sat on the stairs with tears feeling up her eyes. Worst case scenario - stay in the lab for the next two days 'til Monday, drink double-distilled (!) water, switch on the computers and chat whole day & night, start breaking into my lab-mates' lockers for junk food. Or just eat the cute little pet-insects away for proteins. Oh... plus having a resident ghost accompanying her for the next 2 days.

To be continue......this is where the fun part starts: a miracle, a hero.